The Right Way To Have Casual Sex

young couple embracong

Casual sex comes in all shapes, flavours, sizes, and positions. While it can be great; casual sex does come with a warning. If you go in with unrealistic expectations or if casual hook-ups leave you feeling cheap and used (in a non-kinky sort of way), it has the potential to end badly. It can be a tricky maze to navigate, but with basic ground rules and the right approach you can master no-strings sex without getting tied up.

Choose Wisely

Successful no-strings-attached sex starts long before the clothes are on the floor. It begins at the bar, club, Tinder, or wherever you like to work your magic.

Search for a partner that isn’t looking for a relationship. They aren’t a rare unicorn, there are plenty out there. Many individuals are independent now and don’t want the complications of pairing up with someone. Always verify before taking it any further.

Set Your Intentions

If what you want is casual sex, remember that you are looking for casual sex. Think about what casual sex means: physical pleasure without emotional baggage. Don’t try to fool yourself into thinking that you can have casual sex if you already have feelings for someone. If both of you go into this with the expectation that it will be nothing more than sex; it should remain this way. Changing the end goal is not only unfair on your partner, but to yourself as well.

Establish mutually agreed upon ground rules about things like protection protocol, how often you’ll see each other, what kind of activities you’ll engage in (both in bed and out), and what happens if feelings change. The clearer everyone is on where they stand and what they want, the less chance there is for your rendezvous to take a wrong turn or be a total time-waster.

Location Location Location

Unless there is some mitigating reason not to (like their flatmate is a bit of a creeper) always go to their place so you can leave and keep control of the time you spend together without the awkwardness of them overstaying their welcome.

Avoid date scenarios like trips to the cinema and romantic dinners, meet for casual drinks instead. Be conscious of how much time you are spending together and avoid any opportunities to meet their friends and family – it could be a sign they are hoping for more. If they appear to be becoming attached, be prepared to deal with it quickly and head on. Either slow things down or move on.

Play It Safe

Hookups are hot and heavy, spur-of-the-moment explosions of lust and libido. And yes, part of the appeal of casual sex is its lack of obligations, but your health still matters.

Have an upfront conversation about whether you’re both sleeping with other people. Discuss the last time you got tested. And regardless of the answers, wrap it up. Every time.

Enjoy Yourself

You have to remember that this relationship is all about sex, and so it is pointless reading too much into the actions of your partner. This is true in any relationship, but is even more important when it comes to a casual relationship. In the same way, it’s easy to worry about what they will thinks about your kinks or whatever you’re insecure about – you may or may not ever see this person again, who cares if they think you’re weird for wanting a spanking? Tell them to spank you!

Know When to End It

Even the best casual sex doesn’t last forever. The spark eventually fades, or the situation explodes in your face, or you fall in love and suddenly things aren’t so casual anymore. Sex is unpredictable, and that’s part of why it’s so much fun.

Learn to recognise the signs that the time has arrived, and when it does, let go with grace and your dignity intact. Then start again. You have to keep in mind your intentions and stick to them to ensure you have a great time and get the most out of the experience.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *